Countdown: 68 days...Remembering when I was President

 Someone mentioned Thin Mints the other day, and I regretted that we hadn't stocked up on those tasty chocolate wafers when we had had a chance from the girls in green. I also never had a chance to be a Girl Scout myself, growing up in the country instead in town.  

I did, however, belong to 4-H, and when I was 16, I was elected president of the "Busy Beavers 4-H Club" and got to sit in the middle of the officers at the table in the front of the gym at my old elementary school.  I don't think my duties extended much beyond presiding over these bi-weekly meetings and I expect I had a lot of help from the adult leaders (my mom being one of them). I don't remember agonizing over agendas or responsibilities or basking in triumphs of inspirational leadership.  

The power of the office was minor and I wore it lightly.  I never took time off to go golfing, used my office for monetary gain or incited insurrections.  Leveraging power to deviate from the norms never crossed my adolescent brain.

Just think how comfortable we've been most of our lives adhering to the social constructs, taboos and behavior norms that formed the sea we swam in and the air we breathed.  Even in my rebellious moments when I rolled my skirt up over my knees in response to dress codes, all my friends did it too.  We may have pushed the limits, but we understood what the limits were and knew we might face consequences for our actions.  Guilt and shame were part of our vocabulary and our experience.  We made mistakes and were set straight by parents and teachers and maybe even by Mrs. Anderson from across the street.  

Life had predictability and boundaries.  We might not have liked the rules and the expectations, but in a way they gave us a sense of safety and security.  If I was feeling uncomfortable somewhere and wanted to leave, saying my parents expected me home at 10 would be believed.  Parents were like that. Rules were like that.

But now, many of us are feeling rudderless and adrift in a tempestuous sea.  There may be rules, but we don't understand them and they don't seem to be applied fairly.  Unfair rules have long been part of life for many segments of our society, but as a nation we still honored the idea of rules and norms, goals and aspirations, if not always the practice.  We called it Democracy.  We called it the American Dream.  We called in our Beacon to the World.

Trump has shattered norms, broken rules and laws, committed serious breaches of decency, honor and tradition and time and again, he has avoided consequences and now has been rewarded with the highest seat of power.  This is seriously out of whack. Somehow, the American conscience has become uprooted from reality and from the principles that have been a consistent thread throughout our history.

This uprooting means that a ne'er-do-well sexual offender like Matt Gaetz (a Butthead look-alike) can be considered a viable candidate for Attorney General and a Fox News bloviator, Pete Hegseth (multiple adulterer) would be the perfect Secretary of Defense and rid our military of the scourge of "wokeness." The circus is in town.

 When people are able to accept "Up" as "Down" and "In" as "Out" something has to give in their psyche.  We see that there is mental gymnastics going on at a nationwide level.  Many people have to be feeling cognitive dissonance and need to practice a lot of self-justification to hold on to their beliefs.  If we point out flaws in their thinking or judgment, they can't safely acknowledge that truth.  We become the target--we are the ones that are wrong.  Responses can be ostracism (exclusion from the group, family, etc.) anger and rebukes or differing levels of threat. 

STEP 7: Seek to Understand The New Mindset of America

• Learn about logical fallacies...right wing rhetoric provides a smorgasbord of these.  My source for great critical thinking materials is The School of Thought https://yourlogicalfallacyis.com
• Detect the "tells" in conservative arguments--what strategies do you hear?  Blame?  False Equivalencies?  This is advice I found on the Rational Voices Facebook Page.

• 

  
  
• Avoid arguments that can put you at risk without reward.  Figure out when engagement is useful and potentially effective; don't make yourself a target unnecessarily.
• Recommended reading: Mistakes Were Made (But Not By Me)
    Renowned social psychologists Carol Tavris and Elliot Aronson take a compelling look into how the brain is wired for self-justification. This updated edition concludes with an extended discussion of how we can live with dissonance, learn from it, and perhaps, eventually, forgive ourselves.

Why is it so hard to say “I made a mistake”—and really believe it?

When we make mistakes, cling to outdated attitudes, or mistreat other people, we must calm the cognitive dissonance that jars our feelings of self-worth. And so, unconsciously, we create fictions that absolve us of responsibility, restoring our belief that we are smart, moral, and right—a belief that often keeps us on a course that is dumb, immoral, and wrong. Backed by years of research, Mistakes Were Made (But Not by Me) offers a fascinating explanation of self-justification—how it works, the damage it can cause, and how we can overcome it.

“Entertaining, illuminating and—when you recognize yourself in the stories it tells—mortifying.”—Wall Street Journal

“Every page sparkles with sharp insight and keen observation. Mistakes were made—but not in this book!”—Daniel Gilbert, author of Stumbling on Happiness

Countdown 69 (continued)

 What if the German people in the 1930's had been able to look into the future and see all the death and destruction that lay ahead for them and the world?  Would they have remained complacent followers or would they have taken more decision actions while they still had a chance?  

We can't know for sure what the Trump administration will do to reach their stated goals, but we have some pretty certain clues of what they would like to do and are already selecting people to accomplish them.  

When it comes to immigration, one of the key planks of the platform, Tom Homan, former ICE director has been selected as "border czar." Don't expect compassionate conservatism from this man.  The Forbes article linked to his name is brief, but chilling...as ICE.  Mass deportations, workplace arrests, family separation, zero tolerance, and frequent use of defiant swear words.  I didn't catch any nuanced concerns about the impact this would have on agricultural production or building trades when millions of workers are deported.

When it comes to the climate, take a brief look at Lee Zeldin, former New York representative who is tapped to be the EPA chief, with a goal to " restore US energy dominance, revitalize our auto industry..." Such priorities could be why the Sierra Club considers him to be "unqualified."

We could go on about Steven Miller, Elise Stefanik, Mike Huckabee, Marco Rubio, Kristi Noem; a real Rogue's Gallery of appointees is forming.

I had indicated earlier that I was going to talk about effective actions we can take.  Am I suggesting that we take on the all of these agencies, with all of their powers and bring them down?  Well, not exactly.  Several days ago I talked about planning our charitable giving to do some of this fighting for us with their knowledge and legal clout. It's for our own protection that we learn who the players are, what their agendas are and support organizations that are likely to be the most successful in combating the negative outcomes. 

I'm suggesting that we work where we are.  In a very short time, the newly elected people in down ballot races will be sworn into office; at your city hall, county commission, school board, state legislature.  It's time to get to know who they are and where they stand on issues that matter to you.  

Is your city going to ease regulations that could impact your water supply?  Is the school board going to ban books, cut staffing in important positions, or discriminate against marginalized students?  In Minnesota, there will be a Democratic governor (welcome back Tim), a senate with a one member advantage for Democrats and a split House which will have to share leadership.  Individual members can have significant impact if they do not all follow the party line. 

Here's where we can have a personal impact.  Some legislators are savvy operators, but not all.  Many
work in obscurity.  Council meetings generally don't compete with popcorn and Netflix on the couch, so unless there is a big issue on the agenda, you won't have trouble finding a seat.  Elected officials will generally be glad you are there, especially if you display cordial curiosity and not hostile belligerence.

Show up, listen, introduce yourself.  Then do it again.  Speak in the public forum if you have something to say. Invite others (offer a ride and a beverage or snack) Maybe everything will be great.  Now you know. Write and thank them for good governance, or keep going back and expect better.

Step 6: Become Informed About Local Government

1. Consult a government website to learn the names and contact information of all the officials that have direct influence on you and your community.  In Minnesota you can consult  https://mn.gov/portal/government/state
2. Send a letter or email to those officials to let them know, as one of their constituents, you'll be watching them and expecting them to live up to their oaths.  Get on their mailing lists.  Encourage like-minded neighbors and friends to do the same.  It doesn't matter which side of the aisle they are on...knowing they are being scrutinized is fine. Send both compliments and complaints. 
3. For national officials there are a number of websites that do a good job of data gathering about proposed laws and lawmakers committee work and voting trends.  I get a regular email from https://www.govtrack.us/ with the votes of my Senators and Representative and there is a wealth of other information as well.  Some of it will require a little research to understand, but a lot of the charts and graphs are downright fascinating to study.
4. Remember the tagline of the Washington Post..."Democracy Dies in Darkness". While they may have fallen down on the job, we don't have to.  We can shine a light on what is happening where we live and make a difference.

Countdown…69

Today, after a better night’s sleep, I’m going to get into effective actions we can take that will have real impacts, especially as we build coalitions, both formal and informal. Even alone we can effect change…but we’re not alone!

Countdown to the Apocalypse: 70 days left

According to my fitbit watch I got 1 hour and 58 minutes of sleep last night.  I don't think that was completely accurate, but let's just say I'm not exactly well-rested today.  Yet, I can say, what kept me awake most was thoughts of this blog project; of finding solutions and strategies, rather than just fuming and fussing.

I had nowhere to go today, so I pursued putting my house in order.  After a career in libraries I have really good organization skills--you should see my color-coded closet, organized files and my tidy drawers. Ah, if only I was the complete package.  Being good at organization, yes; being good at staying organized, not necessarily so.  

I like to start projects more than I like to finish them; but today I finished some projects and made steps to finish others. Regaining control of the things I actually can control quiets the fears just a little bit.  

I realized that the election results hit me like a terrifying medical diagnosis might have.  After the shock subsides you have to decide like both Andy and Red did in the Shawshank Redemption to "get busy living or get busy dying."  I like the idea of living; and living my best life while I'm at it.  Creating clean, uncluttered space in your environment is something positive I can do to combat despair and make space for calmness.

But I didn't really plan on writing about cathartic cleaning today. Some of what kept me awake last night was thinking about the importance of sleep.  Ironic, huh?  

My bed has always felt like a sanctuary, a safe place, just as long as I am completely under the covers, with only my nose and the top of my head exposed.  I still sleep that way, even on hot summer nights. 

 That habit started when I was about 10 years old.  We lived in a small 6-room farmhouse--you came in through an entry room with a wringer washer, electric dryer and chest freezer past where my dad's work clothes were hung into a small kitchen. There was a bathroom off the kitchen, with a toilet that was added when I was about eight.  The other half of the house had a living room and dining room and there were two bedrooms upstairs; maybe 800 square feet total.  I often wondered how the family of eight who had lived there before us had managed.

To get to the bedrooms with their slanted eaves, you had to go back out to the entry and up a narrow enclosed stairway with a dim bulb at the top. One night, my usually over-protective mom let me watch a horror movie from 1930's.  It left me utterly terrified, but I'm not sure she ever knew that.  Perhaps she approved because the stars were big name actors, or she had other chores to attend to and didn't even watch it with me.

The movie was called Devil-Doll and it starred Lionel Barrymore (who played the dastardly Mr. Potter in the Christmas classic, "It's a Wonderful Life") and Maureen O'Sullivan (who had played Jane in the Tarzan movies with Johnny Weismuller.) There was a mad scientist, a revenge plot and people shrunk to the size of dolls, not that different from my 2-foot tall wedding dolls that were treasured possessions.  These "dolls" were sent to kill enemies in their homes while they slept.  When the movie was over, I had to get upstairs and go to bed before my parents--how fast could I negotiate that dark and treacherous stairway to the safety of my bed?  Pretty darn fast!  The stairway was scary at night for years, but luckily, my bed was always safe (proper cover arrangement mandatory of course.)

At this moment the bedroom is tidy, I replaced a powerstrip that had a brightly lighted switch for one that didn't glow and I'm going to resolve to keep this room as a sanctuary spot where sleep will be safe and restorative and commit to practice better sleep routines.  

Step 5: Create a sanctuary space for safe and comfortable sleep

There are lots of strategies to help with sleep

• Create a consistent schedule
• Avoid caffeine and other stimulants close to bedtime
• Dark and cool promotes better sleep
• Avoid electronics before bed
• Bedtime rituals can prepare your body for sleep
• Reading
• Meditating or other spiritual practices
• Taking a bath
• Aromatherapy
• Replace your mattress if needed or add a comfy mattress pad
• Get a sleep test if snoring or sleep apnea may be a problem
• Don't lie in bed if you can't sleep for 20 minutes or more, but get up and do a relaxing activity
• Try the 10-3-2-1-0 formula

Sleepless nights happen--it's not a competition to get the best sleep records on your fitness tracker.  Be gentle with yourself.  Napping is okay, in fact, sometimes it's wonderful. 

Pleasant dreams!

    

Countdown to the Apocalypse 71 Days left

Saturday was pleasant for November and my husband and I did the last garden chores and garage cleaning, preparing for the long winter coming soon.  We just need to wash and oil the long-handled garden tools, stash them in the attic and then announce to ourselves--"Good enough."

Then we'll move on to the other preparations that we need to make for the dark days ahead and these preparations will take a little more thought and care and we can't settle for just good enough. 

I not going to suggest that we have to hunker down like doomsday preppers, but I am going to look at lists of survival equipment and supplies to have on hand.  After the widespread destruction of Hurricane Helene, the need for access to water and back up food supplies when there is no access to power or safe travel routes seems very important, regardless of where you live or what catastrophic event has occurred.  

For many of us, the catastrophic event that was election day has inevitable but uncertain consequences.  How can we prepare for so many unknowns?  Uncertainty is so uncomfortable and shakes our confidence.  Purposeful safety preparation is one small way that we can get some control back in our lives, so that we can avoid panic and muster our courage and strength when it is needed.  There are many things outside of our control, but we are not powerless. One area to consider is our personal and family safety.

STEP 4:  Prepare to be safe regardless of the situation

Let's ensure that we have a plan for our personal and family security in case we have to stay in place or evacuate.  Here's a list of things to gather suggested by the Red Cross.  This is a good idea that most of us have ignored, but we can bring a new mindfulness of the potential challenges ahead.  

1. Food: non-perishable, easy-to-prepare items (3-day supply for evacuation, 2-week supply for home)
2. Water: One gallon per person, per day (3-day supply for evacuation, 2-week supply for home)
3. Flashlight
4. Battery-powered or hand-crank radio (NOAA Weather Radio, if possible)
5. Extra batteries
6. First aid kit
7. Medications (7-day supply) and medical items
8. Multi-purpose tool
9. Sanitation and personal hygiene items
10. Copies of personal documents (medication list and pertinent medical information, proof of address, deed/lease to home, passports, birth certificates, insurance policies)
11. Cell phone with chargers
12. Family and emergency contact information
13. Extra cash
14. Emergency blanket
15. Map(s) of the area

After you gather those basic supplies for your kit, add unique things each member of your family may need, such as:

1. Medical supplies (hearing aids with extra batteries, glasses, contact lenses, syringes, etc)
2. Baby supplies (bottles, formula, baby food, diapers)
3. Games and activities for children
4. Pet supplies (collar, leash, ID, food, carrier, bowl)
5. Two-way radios
6. Extra set of car keys and house keys
7. Manual can opener

Depending on the types of disasters that are common where you live, also consider adding these things to your kit:

1. Whistle
2. N95 or surgical masks
3. Matches and candles
4. Rain gear
5. Towels
6. Work gloves
7. Tools/supplies for securing your home
8. Extra clothing, hat and sturdy shoes
9. Plastic sheeting
10. Duct tape
11. Scissors
12. Household liquid bleach
13. Entertainment items
14. Blankets or sleeping bags

After you assemble a kit that contains the items or a list of what is needed and how and where they can be accessed quickly, have a family council to make an emergency plan together and role play your actions.

In future posts we'll explore other ways to prepare ourselves mentally, physically, financially and spiritually.  See you tomorrow.

...Now where is that covered tub that's just the size I need to gather all this stuff?

Countdown to the Apocalypse Day 72

 Last night I was sitting at my desk, sorting through bills and all the requests I get for donations.  When we don't have the time or energy to march, protest or volunteer we may open our wallets.  I have to admit that pictures of endangered hungry creatures whether they are children, pets or wild animals in Africa can move me to write a check and hope that it will make a difference.  

Now, I am thinking the same about how my dollars can make a difference to the democratic future of this country.  When the candidates I supported with my money did not prevail at the polls, it can feel like wasted effort. Was it?  With our economic future uncertain, how can I make my donations have the biggest impact and in the ways I want it to?

For quite awhile I have been consulting Charity Navigator before I make a contribution.  It is a website that rates charities on their financial health and stability, program expense ratio, leadership compensation, transparency, etc.  You can also use their site to directly donate to the charities you support without sending out multiple envelopes and can maintain a record of your giving for tax purposes. 

I choose generally not to contribute to organizations on the phone, so I can check them out before I give.  All those "law enforcement legal defense fund" callers get a quick "good-bye" from me.  The scams and cheaters are plentiful.  I am now adding another website to consult, Charity Watch, because I've become aware that charities may not all be forthcoming with accurate data given Charity Navigator and might not deserve their star ratings.

I'm closer to doing the best I can with the money I can give, but is there more to know at a time when there is so much at stake? Yes, and again I turn to Clearer Thinking that I cited yesterday and a mini course they offer called "Leaving Your Mark:  

There's a lot to think about, but if you have the time, it's very worthwhile; in fact it could help you save lives and make a real difference.  This has led me to yet another charity evaluation site: Give Well that they cite in the course and is closer to effective altruism.

Effective Altruism (capitalized) is about doing good better. It is a research field and a practical community that aims to find the best ways to help others, and put them in practice.  Doing Good Better is also the title of a book that I just ordered from eBay for $3.85.  

These strategies are good for any time, but at the moment, I'm thinking the greatest needs will be in effective legal defense of programs and people that will be targeted by Trump.  

I'm going to be looking at the ACLU and other human rights groups, environmental groups that have track records of defending wildlife and public land.  We know that social welfare programs will be negatively impacted and we can research those that have a good track record of doing the most good for the most people.  

Perhaps your concern will be for attacks on reproductive rights, or the free press and public broadcasting.  We'll have to cautiously investigate lobbying groups and other advocacy groups.  As a lifelong reader, librarian and bookseller, I am going to consider support for intellectual freedom.

STEP THREE:

• Learn more about effective altruism and charitable giving that can contribute to maintaining our democracy.  
• Publicize your concerns (in ways that work for you) about the issues that you select to support and why you feel support is needed.  Encourage others to join you.  Include publicly stated or documented threats from the president or Project 2025 as evidence.  
• This could include writing to your legislative representatives, both state and national, about your concerns and fears.  I plan to make all those making decisions that impact our future recognize my name.

Countdown to the Apocalypse: Day 73

 Reckoning...so much reckoning going on.  

On Wednesday I went to my church because they had opened their doors for people struggling with the shock of the election results.  There were both doughnuts and tissue boxes on the table and candles to light in the sanctuary.  I partook of all of it, including the listening ears of the pastors and their wise counsel.  

Everyone around the table talked about the new reality of dealing with the triumphant Trump voters in our lives; family members, neighbors, lifelong friends.  Pastor Jack said something that resonated with me.

"The reasons, the very good reasons that I rejected Trump, are not necessarily the reasons that the people I know voted for him.  While I don't agree, I can't assume that we looked at him the same way."  

They voted for a man that will bring pain, destruction and chaos, but not necessarily for those reasons. Yes, I think, yes, the good people I know wouldn't cause that kind of harm to others in their lives; but they had to know, at some level, that harm will happen to migrants, to political opponents, to journalists, to people in marginalized communities and at some level they have to think that is justifiable and good.

So here is a reckoning moment.  I grew up in a small farming community, a farmer's daughter myself. In high school I had a large circle of trusted friends and our friendships have survived the many years hence.  We try to get together at least once a year and sometimes more.  These women are all bright, capable and solid wives, mothers and grandmothers.  They are good people that I love.  But I know that our paths diverged politically.  Most stayed as conservatively Christian as they were raised, I did not.  My life experiences took me far from that farm, yet that rural ethos of caring for neighbors and the land, of working hard and being decent and honest has never left me.

I have not held back my political views on public forums, such as Facebook or X.  I have written letters to the editor and was interviewed for a Democratic voter opinion article in the Minnesota Star Tribune that was published just before the National Convention in August.  Where I stand is clear.  

For the most part, these friends have not engaged with me politically, until yesterday.  Then two of them made comments about the same post: one about the messages that parents are sending their children by voting for Trump--it's okay to mock the disabled, cheating is acceptable, always blame others, etc.  It struck a discordant note with them and they pushed back.  

I do not want to lose my friends.  I do not want to give up my values.  Many of you will find yourself in a similar place, faced with the potential of a tradeoff you don't want to make.  At this moment I will do all I can to keep my treasured friendships.  I will acknowledge and consider their points-of-view, I will remind them of my love and respect for them, but I will stay true to my own truth.

In order to do that I have to be clear about what my values and my truths are, I have to make a deep and honest dive into what I believe and why I believe it.  It should not be superficial or flippant.  It should not be a rehashing of what I was taught but a look at my lived truth and my highest aspirations. I should be prepared to change and revise it if necessary. That's not an easy assignment.  

Step Two (Day 73 BTA) Before the Apocalypse

Write down the values I hold and why they are important to me.  Add stories.  Put this in a place where I can revisit it often to refine and reflect.  Look for sources of inspiration. Here is one.

Sources to help you in this process:

https://www.clearerthinking.org/post/your-intrinsic-values-why-they-matter-and-how-to-find-them

Clearer Thinking is a marvelous resource to help us become better, wiser, and more effective human beings.  This link takes you to an article that helps you understand what intrinsic values are and includes an interesting quiz to help you identify your own most important values.   

Hammarskjold, Dag. Markings, 1964

A powerful journal of poems and spiritual meditations recorded over several decades by a universally known and admired peacemaker. A dramatic account of spiritual struggle, Markings has inspired hundreds of thousands of readers since it was first published in 1964. Markings is distinctive, as W.H. Auden remarks in his foreword, as a record of "the attempt by a professional man of action to unite in one life the via activa and the via contemplativa ." It reflects its author's efforts to live his creed, his belief that all men are equally the children of God and that faith and love require of him a life of selfless service to others. For Hammarskjöld, "the road to holiness necessarily passes through the world of action." Markings is not only a fascinating glimpse of the mind of a great man, but also a moving spiritual classic that has left its mark on generations of readers.

Do you have sources to add?  Please add them in the comments.  I will continue to build a resource list on all topics I cover.